What a cat Polar was. He truly had the regal air of a handsome feline prince; so strong and proud. Those big yellow golden eyes, the pink nose and ears. He was quite adorable. When he was a good healthy size he weighed in at about18 lbs. I used to call him my "big galoot"–He could move a good size chair several inches from its original position just by leaning in to it! He was such a clown too–when he’d dash, to and fro, excited by the sheer energy of his own movement in space, rear haunches enacting a hilarious skipping maneuver, something that never failed to make me chuckle.
In the spring of 2003 when I first saw him at the humane society I just knew I could love him…as his name implied, he was like a BIG lovable polar bear. He was so quiet and retiring when I first made his acquaintance. Little did I know that he would turn out to be an EXTREMELY vocal and sometimes quite demanding kitty. In all honesty we were not always a very good match for one another. But, he was my baby and I did the best I could for him.
The first months with him saw several urinary tract infections, the last of which was life threatening. He eventually had a radical penectomy so as to widen his urethra to allow for the safe passage of the blood clots he was so prone to. This surgical procedure was not inexpensive, and at the time I really couldn’t afford it…Still I went through with it, and I like to think that it truly did improve the quality of his life for a time. However, the urinary tract issues continued to be a problem; and this regardless of the special urinary tract cat food he was fed and the tidiness of his litter box.
And so, here I am today without my cat. The past six months have not been pleasant for either of us. Polar simply could not get enough water into his system no matter how much of it he drank. Nearly as soon as it was drunk, he would all too quickly go to the litter box and urinate. He never had any problems in the appetite department. But sometimes it didn’t stay down for long. These internal problems soon began to cause the poor guy gradual weight loss (and he was fed 1/3 of a cup three times a day!), until he was a weak 11 lbs when I took him to the vet this afternoon.
I left work early and by the time I got home I was sobbing and crying because I knew where this visit to the vet would lead. I no longer had funds for expensive vet bills. The options were weighed, and Polar would be given an injection, and then he would go to sleep… It was the most that I could afford to alleviate his suffering; and mine.
So now my little boy Polar can cavort and run to his hearts content in the big kitty play land in the sky; no more worries of uti’s or my sometimes scolding voice. I don’t pretend to actually know if that’s true or not, but it lightens my heart just a bit to think of it as such. I do believe if we humans have souls, then so too do the animals. I know Polar had a BIG heart; such a sweetie, so lovable. I won’t forget you guy.