I miss you Baby. I’m sorry we didn’t catch your condition sooner. If I could go back in time I still don’t know when or how we would have caught it sooner but I rack my brain nonetheless trying to figure it out. Trying to understand why all the pieces didn’t add up to me sooner. I wish I hadn’t left you for the summer, I didn’t know it would be our last and I knew the journey across country would be hard for you, so I’m not sorry that I left you behind with Rose, I’m just sorry I didn’t stay as well and did more stuff with you. But would I have done more? Or would I just have been wrapped up with my other dogs as I usually was. You always loved Rose and you and I never really got along. You were a princess in your own world, a cat more than a dog in so many ways, and I wanted a dog. I wanted the jovial unconditional goofy love that my other dogs give me and you were so much more reserved than that. You saved your love for those you thought deserved it. I don’t fault you for that. I wasn’t the best owner to you, I resented you for not obeying and being like the other dogs. Now I understand that you were just on a different plane than they are. I miss you so much, Baby. Pee on my clothes, I don’t care. Chew up the ones I left on the floor, I don’t care, I just miss you so much. Do all the things that made me mad, I don’t care. I just miss you so much.